how to enjoy life

How to Enjoy Life Whilst Pursuing Your Goals

how to enjoy life

A few years ago, I made a life-changing decision.

I had just met the girl of my dreams, I had turned my health around and I was more motivated than ever. I then decided to leave a highly paid graduate job to pursue my career as a coach as well as financial freedom.

Although I was terrified and didn’t really know where to start, every time I thought of the life I wanted with Katie and the life I wanted to create for the rest of my family, all of the fear disappeared. A part of me just ‘knew’ that this had to be done.

Read more

5 Things Successful People do When ‘It all goes Wrong’ (Just doing #4 will Help)

ID-10075457I am a big fan of the phrase “sometimes life just happens”. What I mean by this, sometimes life will throw an unexpected challenge your way. However, sometimes life will just, flat out open a trap door from under you. You know, those times when you don’t know where to turn and you don’t know what to do.

You start to panic and you start to either ‘freeze’ or start to act like a crazy person.

There are some who people who respond to ‘life’s trap door’ with a huge measure of relaxed control.

How the heck do they do it?!

Below are 5 Things that they do to positively overcome an onslaught of adversity.

They See the Situation as it is…NOT worse than it is!

When a negative situation shows itself in our life, our mind absolutely loves exaggerating the extent of it. In a instant our mind can turn forgetting to pay a bill into becoming totally bankrupt. A happy, relaxed, successful person will tell you to focus on the reality of the situation and don’t add bits on.

They Focus on the Fact that Every Problem has a Solution

Once you have this realization you are cultivating the ability to deal with whatever comes your way. We live in a universe where things exist in opposites. Hot/Cold, Up/Down, Big/Small etc. Shifting your focus to the opposite of your problem (the solution) you are directing your mind to a more positive outcome.

They find things to be Grateful for

When things are ‘falling apart’ it is the can be a real challenge to focus on being grateful. You may not feel like feeling grateful for a long time in fact. However, happy, successful people know that finding things to be grateful for during the toughest times can shift your focus and bring you into a ‘Solution Focused’ mindset much quicker. By truly getting in touch with some of the things that you are grateful for you are taking control over the ‘crisis’ and turning it into a workable situation. You are taking back control because you are now the driving force of your mind.

They Stop ‘Negative Thought Cycles’

Negative thought cycles are those negative thoughts that just keep coming back into your head. You keep thinking “What the heck am I going to do?”, “Why always me?”, “I knew this would happen”. These thought patterns are stopping you from finding a creative solution and you’re making yourself feel even worse. A great strategy employed by the happy, successful elite is the ability to ask solution focused questions:

What is the best way for me to find a solution?

If there was a positive reason for this happening to me what would it be?

What am I willing to do to make things the way I want them to be?

By asking questions like these you are once again, powerfully shifting your focus to solutions.

They accept the Situation

By truly practising the art of acceptance you are detaching yourself from the dramatic, over exaggerations of the situation and you are left with the simple truth. When you stop yourself from reacting on impulse the challenges you are facing become much more simple. Without proper control our natural instinct tends to be to react. These reactions can often make the situation worse. The solution focused course of action is to ‘respond’ rather than ‘react’.

Above all, when you are faced with these very difficult situations the fact of the matter is whatever has happened has happened and when it comes to managing the situation. The choice is yours.

I’d love to hear about how you stay relaxed when it seems like ‘everything’ is going wrong?

End of Post

[hcshort id=”8″]

 

 

4 Things Goal Achievers will do in 2015 (Number 2 Takes the most Effort)

ID-100192667We are half way through the first month of 2015 and unfortunately there are already some people out there who have lost sight achieving their goals this year. You deserve to achieve every single one of your goals, as does everyone. We have an abundance of potential locked inside of us and it just takes some smart work to release it. Success can never be ‘guaranteed’ but it can be made more likely.

There are 4 things that people that look back on 2015 with a smile of achievement are going to do:

1. Take Daily Action on Bite Sized ‘Chunks’ of their ultimate Goal

As Tony Robbins says; “Clarity is Power!”. The people who achieve their goals in 2015 aren’t just going to have goals for the whole year; they are going to have things that they can do every day and every week to make progress towards their goals. For Example, if your goal is to make £3000 per month in Sales Commissions, you can enhance your likelihood of achieving this by ‘chunking’ it down. If each client makes you £1000, you have to bring in 3 clients per month. If your average sales ratio is 1 Sale out of every 10 meetings then you need to organize, plan and attend 30 meetings per month. The successful people of 2015 will take this a step further by scheduling 2 meetings per working day (40 per month), just to be safe).

The people that fall short of their goals in 2015 may not have a clear idea of how to get there and without breaking the goal down into bite sized chunks they be too overwhelmed to even get started.

2. Work on their Goals Even When they can’t be Bothered

People who are successful in 2015 will show up every single day of the year to make a dent in their goals. They may not feel motivated at the start of the gym session but the motivation will come as they realise ‘they’re doing it anyway’. Of course, sometimes you will make ‘quantum leaps’ but more often than not you are going to have to be disciplined and take action every day to achieve your goals this year. Make a commitment to realizing that the most important meeting, gym session or phone call is the one that you can’t be bothered with.

3. Stay Healthy

To really achieve all of their goals in 2015 the successful people are going to stay healthy. People that are successful this year are going to place a lot of emphasis on eating well, exercising and staying relaxed. They are going to consciously take control of their daily habits so they can stay healthy and be in a state to achieve all year. Staying healthy this year will allow you to be energized enough to achieve your goals. Make a record of the things that you are doing every day and ask yourself “are these actions are going to allow you to be successful this year?” If not commit to changing the negative habits into positive, healthy ones.

4. Stay Positive and Confident

You don’t need to know much about happy, successful people to realize that they stay positive and confident. People that do not achieve success this year will become entangled in negative thought processes. Thought processes like; ‘I’m not good enough, or ‘I’m not ready’. The people that achieve success in 2015 will not let negative thoughts hold them back. They will reframe these negative thoughts and turn their ‘inner critic’ into an ‘inner coach’. Without taking control of your moment to moment thought processes life can be a pretty negative place to be as highlighted in this video 

End of Post

[hcshort id=”8″]

How to be more Confident in 6 Easy Steps

c1When I first decided that there were several things that I wanted to create in my life, I didn’t believe that I was capable of achieving them. I wanted to write a book but I thought it would be too difficult for me because I wasn’t the best at English in school. I wanted to be a speaker but I thought my regional accent would hold me back. I wanted to be in a relationship but my past told me that I wasn’t cut out for one.

You may not have a long list of things that you want to do but you can can probably empathise with the feeling of really wanting to do something and being to scared to get started. Living in this fear stifles your potential and stops you from being able to share your gifts and talents with the world. There are, of course, many different things that fuel that fear and one of those will regularly be a lack of confidence. Confidence is a learned skill and just by following the steps below on how to be more confident you will build momentum towards being the most confident version of yourself.

1. Take a Compliment

I find it absolutely fascinating how people will so easily believe the negative things that they hear and totally ignore or even disagree with the positive. There is a pleasant, humble way to take a compliment and that is to simply say “Thank You”. Avoid saying things like “Oh no, don’t be silly, me?”. Use the compliments you receive to fuel your confidence. After you have said “Thank You” out loud you can get to work into growing the confidence in your own head. You can think ‘You know what, I did do a great job and that means that I can do it over and over again.

2. Practice Being Confident

All skills improve with intelligent practice and confidence is one of those things. My favourite way of practising being confident is when I meet new people. They don’t you which means you can show them the best, most authentically confident version of yourself. Think about how a confident person would move and speak whilst thinking confident thoughts. Hold your back and shoulders high and straight and speak with a clear measured voice.

You can practice the physiological side of being confident anywhere. Get in front of of mirror, puff your chest up, throw shoulders back, hold your head up and smile a that type of smile you smiled as a kid when you new a really cool secret. It may take time but it’s a skill and you will get better.

3. Trust Yourself

You know what you are good at; trust yourself to be good at those things. You should also trust in your ability and desire to improve and learn, knowing that you can always do even better next time. It is important that you are trusting in your capabilities and not someone else’s. Avoid comparisons. The only comparison you should make is the comparison to the person that you were last week, last month and last year.

4. Embrace Your ‘Toddler Confidence’

When you entered this world you had no idea about insecurities or the possibility of being judged. You just new what you needed and you did what you could to get it. When you were learning to walk you didn’t give up because you failed at your first step, you somehow ‘knew’ that you were going to master it so you just confidently kept going.

Unfortunately, this started to change when you became aware of people seeing you in different ways and the possibilities of positive and negative feedback. If you started to get a lot of negative feedback as you grew older, perhaps you were harsh on yourself and any confidence you had was drained away. When you notice yourself feeling low on confidence, realize that you have learned to feel this way and tap into the confidence that you came into this world with.

5. Take Calculated Risks

Doing the things in the same way that you have always done them doesn’t breed confidence. When I first got into speaking I joined Toastmasters International and I really enjoyed it and I learned so much. However, I began to feel comfortable with the 15-20 people that were there every week. When I was asked to compere a charity event and also be the auctioneer for 200 people, I thought to myself ‘Absolutely no way!”. Then I knew that jumping in and just doing it would be a calculated risk that would further my career. I made some mistakes and had some technical problems to deal with but it was a massive turning point in my speaking career. Had I not taken that calculated risk I’m not sure if I would have spoken to more than 20 people, ever.

6. See Success as Inevitable

You cannot predict the future but isn’t that what many of us do in the negative sense regularly? Have you ever been in a situation that was challenging and presumed that everything was going to go wrong?

I am well aware of this idea that you can expect the worst and then not end up being disappointed if you fall short. But what if I told you that this can just become a self-fulfilling prophecy where you are never overly disappointed when failure shows up but it shows up all the time?

Focus on and expect the tiniest of successes in every waking hour and watch as they increase as if by way of magic.

End of Post

[hcshort id=”8″]

2015: Making my Goals Public

2015-goals2015 is going to be the first year that I make my goals public. By putting them out there for all visitors to my website and my social media followers to see I will raise my standards to the level required for me to achieve them. I recently wrote about the Goals that I managed to achieved in 2014 and the Post regarding my 2015 goals will be even better reading because I made my goals public.

I am extremely grateful for the things that I achieved in 2014 and I have a whole new fire to achieve great things in 2015.

You will notice that my Goals are split into each area of my life so that I can achieve what I call ‘Circular Success’. I state my goals in the present tense which helps me to visualize the goal as already achieved. I have less goals this year as I am going to streamline in order to achieve them all.

Health, Fitness & Muscularity

  • It is December 31st 2015 and I weigh 12 Stone with 8% body fat and a clearly visible 6 Pack.

[I set the date as the last day of the year because in 2014 I got in great shape and then let it slide with too many ‘treat meals’ in December]

  • It is April 30th 2015 and I have had 64 Green Juices and Green Smoothies so far this year. (16 Per Month)
  • It is April 30th 2015 and I can easily do 5 ‘Muscle Ups’ with 15kg’s strapped to me

Business and Finances

  • It is December 31st 2015 and my membership site has over 1000 Members
  • It is December 31st 2015 and jermaine-harris.com has 100+ Blog Posts
  • It is December 31st 2015 and my Foreign Exchange Trading Account Easily makes me £2,500 per month in profits
  • It is December 31st 2015 and I have £7,000 saved towards the deposit on our first House
  • It is December 31st 2015 and I have changed the lives of over 1,000 people this year through events, seminars and training programmes, with earnings of more than £10,000 as direct profit from these events

Lifestyle

  • It is January 30th 2015 and I easily had enough money in my ‘Play Account’ to go to Barcelona for the weekend with my friends and watch FC Barcelona vs. Villareal.
  • It is December 31st 2015 and me, Katie & Fraizer (New Baby) enjoyed a beautiful break away that was at least 3 days long.
  • It is December 31st 2015 and I easily have enough time for 3 rounds of Golf per month.
  • It is April 30th 2015 and I have had plenty of time to decorate our new Home and prepare it for the arrival of the baby.

Relationships

[There are one or two goals that I can’t put here just in case Katie reads this post 😉 Needless to say, she will be cared for, looked after and surprised plenty of times]

  • It is August 12th 2015 and my son is now 3 months old and I have got out of bed every time he needed us and I helped support him and Katie in every way that I could and I have associated positive feelings with the disturbed sleep as I am caring for my son.
  • It is December 31st 2015 and every time that Katie needed a break or to relax I was there to look after the Baby EVERY TIME.
  • It is December 31st 2015 and I orchestrated a Family day out every week I was in the country this year.
  • It is December 31st 2015 and I made visiting my family, friends and ‘future in-laws’ a weekly and monthly priority.

Contribution/Charity

  • It is December 31st 2015 and I easily continued my association with The British Heart Foundation, Cancer Research UK and Dementia UK
  • It is December 25th 2015 and I doubled my contribution to the Homeless Shelter and the Dogs Home this year.
  • It is December 31st 2015 and I doubled my Social Media Reach with my positive messages.

Daily Habits & Self Improvement

  • It is December 31st 2015 and I easily completed my unread book collection purchased another 20 books this year.
  • It is December 31st 2015 and I easily did 3 deep breathing sessions per day this year.
  • It is December 31st 2015 and I easily Worked Mastering Coaching Techniques at least 4 times per week this year,
  • It is December 31st 2015 and I did 192 Morning Rituals this year.

Will you make your Goals Public?

Share your Goals with me below and by making them public you’ll be more likely to take action on them and achieve them. I may even check in with you! Leave your goals in the comment box below and then get to it!

[hcshort id=”8″]

 

 

 

2014: Goals Achieved & Crucial Lessons

Time to Evaluate Clock Review or Assessment Management

At the end of each year I reflect on how far I have come, the goals I managed to achieve, goals that I didn’t achieve and the lessons that I can learn. I first came across this idea when I was listening to a Jim Rohn audiotape. The great Mr. Rohn believe that you should reflect on the previous year for 2 major reasons: Firstly, to notice and celebrate all of the successes of the year. By taking the time out to celebrate your achievements you are reinforcing your belief to go ahead and achieve more goals. I also believe that the feeling of gratitude and pride that this process will give you is absolutely priceless. Secondly, reviewing the goals that you didn’t quite achieve allows you to ask some powerful questions so that you can do even better next time. What did I learn? What’s the best thing that will happen as a result of not achieving the goal? By going through the process of finding the positive lessons in each ‘failure’ you are making sure that you don’t make the same mistakes again and refine your processes for the next year.

The major reason for setting a goal is for what it makes of you to accomplish it. What it makes of you will always be of greater value than what you get.  – Jim Rohn

2014 was the proverbial rollercoaster for me; there were holidays of a lifetime, family tragedies and illnesses, book releases, seminars, a pregnancy and more.

Goals Achieved and Accomplishments

Here the goals that I achieved and other accomplishments in 2014 that I am grateful to have created.

Health, Fitness & MuscularityProgress Pic

  • Had a Green Juice at least 5 days per week
  • Did a 60 Day, 0 Carb ‘Protein and Green’ Eating Plan
  • The above allowed me to get down to 7% Bodyfat (Although this is technically a missed goal as my target was 6%. Still an accomplishment.
  • Ate a spoonful of Coconut Oil every day
  • Achieved my Goal of 10 ‘Muscle Ups’ in a Row

rut b amBusiness and Finances

  • Secured 4 Book Sponsors
  • Released my 1st Book ‘The Rut Buster’ 
  • Published 30 Blog Posts
  • Published 22 Videos to Youtube with my channel growing to over 4,000 views
  • Coached over 15 Clients One on One, helping to improve their lives
  • Conducted my first personal Seminar
  • Conducted my first 2 Day Long Seminar
  • Spoke to Over 400 People in South Africa
  • Launched a membership site
  • I learned how to trade the Foreign Exchange
  • I made 170% profit on my Foreign Exchange Account
  • I successfully separated my money into different accounts to control spending

Lifestylenew car

  • Got a New Car (Goal Accelerated by the Pregnancy of my girlfriend, Katie. I needed a 4 Door Car for the Baby Seat!)
  • Spent a week in Lanzarote, Canary Islands with Katie
  • Spent 5 Days in Las Vegas with Katie
  • Spent a week in Isla Mujeres, Cancun with Katie
  • Had a Great week off with my Friend who visited from Australia
  • Had a Great Long Weekend in Newcastle with my friends

10403519_10152413278711021_8987448470300378458_nRelationships

  • Supported my Nan through her near fatal heart attack and consequent recovery
  • Supported my girlfriend through several family tragedies
  • Visited my Grandfather in his Home regularly
  • Spent time with family and friends every week
  • Found out I am going to be a father
  • Surprised Katie with a Trip to Lanzarote for her Birthday
  • Had at least one Date Night/Date Day every week me and Katie were in the same country.
  • Had a lot of progressive Conversations with my best friend Rhydian of Thought Support
  • Dedicated more time to new relationships both social and business.
  • Coordinated the Rental of my first House with Katie
  • Dedicated myself with to the preparation and learning required to be a great dad

Contribution/Charity10882166_778523075517666_5186376486666244913_n

  • Donated 3.33% of Book Profits to The British Heart Foundation
  • Donated 3.33% of Book Profits to Dementia UK
  • Donated 3.33% of Book Profits to Cancer Research UK
  • Gave £100 worth of Food to the Homeless Shelter on Christmas Eve
  • Gave Dog Food to the Dogs Home on Christmas Eve
  • Gave a lot of time helping people through answering Facebook messages, emails etc.
  • Helped all of the members of my membership site
  • Reached Thousands of People with my positive messages on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest and Instagram
  • Allowed under 16’s to join my membership site for Free

Daily Habits & Self Improvement

  • Read 41 Books
  • Went through ‘Train the Trainer’ in South Africa
  • Created several Pinterest Vision Boards
  • Did my Morning Ritual consistently
  • Did Deep Breathing twice a day
  • Wrote a ‘Gratitude List’ every morning
  • Recorded any inspired thoughts in my journal

My Key Lessons from 2014

  • Going for too many goals at once can cause you to become confused and even stressed. Complete one goal at a time and then move on to the next one.
  • It is something that I always knew intellectually and I really started to practice it in 2014 and that is: what you THINK from moment to moment really will be the major factor in your happiness. Train yourself to focus on what you’re grateful for and to see the beauty in each moment and happiness will follow.
  • Remember to have fun with your friends. I know that people who write about personal development sometimes get caught up on working constantly and I used to be one of them. I realized in 2014 that you have to get out, socialize and enjoy the company of others to really nourish your spirit. Going back to working hard and achieving other goals will then be easier.
  • Being Healthy is easier than you think. Although I have gone to what some people would perceive to be extremes in the past to create rapid results and cure my asthma I have gotten to a stage where health and energy is easy. I make sure that I manage my mind when it comes to craving ‘bad’ foods, have a green juice, a green smoothie, my supplements and lots of greens with every meal and the rest easy. I have also realized that your ‘treat meal’ should be simply enjoyed with no negative feelings afterwards.
  • Nothing feels quite like giving to those with less than you.
  • Helping kids is amazing and they are like sponges. Give them good information and they will act on it and create great results.
  • Make sure that when you create an action plan (to do list) for the day, you mark the Top 3 items that you have to get done. These are the items that will contribute the most to your goals when compared to the rest.
  • The Foreign Exchange is a vehicle for long term wealth.
  • Separate yourself from that automatic ‘Little Voice’ and your true core. That ‘Little Voice’ is lying to you and holding you back by creating fears and excuses. Tell it to shut up and move forward!
  • It is important to keep improving no matter what. There is no destination only continual progress.

Even though 2014 came with it’s challenges, it was an amazing year and 2015 is going to be even better. For the first time I am going to publicly share my yearly goals to create a high level of accountability. Please keep up to date below:

[hcshort id=”8″]

How to Change your Environment and Ultimately your Life

I was overwhelmed when someone that I had never met from Germany e-mailed me and said that he had watched my videos and found me inspiring and that I had changed his life. This was an absolutely incredible feeling and I am so thankful that my videos are doing what they’re supposed to do. My new friend had also explained how I had inspired him to only spend time with positive people in positive places and he wanted more advice on how to build on this.

This raises an important point: You have to surround yourself with people who are going to give you energy and push you up, rather than drain you and pull you down.


If you sit down and think about it, you will realise that you are becoming (or have become) like the people that you most associate with. You think like them, you talk like them, you do the things that they do and you have the same mindset as them. Of course this is absolutely wonderful if you’re surrounded by confident, excited, motivated, healthy, ambitious, hard working people. The challenges arise when you spend all of your time with people who are negative, lazy with low self-esteem, you are truly in danger of becoming the same way. I have been lucky in the fact that I have friends that have understood my transformation and supported it and interestingly enough, to use money as an example, something has happened where we are all finally earning more money than ever before. Although this was the case for me, I can relate when people say that they don’t know where to look when it comes to finding positive influences.

The best thing that you can do is to find these positive associations through books, blogs or youtube videos. You will notice that you are changing your environment just by doing this. These role models that you find through these channels will become part of your psyche just like friends do. The person in the Youtube Videos in the beginning for me was Tony Robbins. I literally started to take on parts of Tony’s mindset, beliefs and habits. This was pretty amazing as Tony Robbins is probably the peak performance genius of our time. You can do the same. Use positive blogs and videos like this one, use books and audio programmes. Do whatever you can to change the people you surround yourself with, whether you are spending face to face time with them or not.

If you have been surrounded by negative, draining people with no ambition the great news is you can reverse the damage. Since deciding to turn my life around I read hundreds of books, attended seminars, paid for programmes and hired coaches. I can tell you right now, it feels like I am genuinely surrounded by these positive people every day because I continually refresh their message. That’s why I love doing what I do now. All of the videos that I make, the programmes that I teach and the blog posts that I write are the culmination of everything that I have learned from all of these people.

As you do this and you become this mixture of all of the great people that you are hanging around with and learning from you will begin to see amazing things happening in your life. From the people you attract to the positive changes that you experience.

It is this feeding and strengthening of the mind that I have become increasingly passionate about in recent months and I really want to help as many people as possible do the same. You see our mind is like a muscle, the more we work it, strengthen it and feed it, the stronger it becomes. If this is something that you’d like to know more about you could Check out my Monthly Mind Upgrade to see how I will upgrade your mind every single month.

 [hcshort id=”8″]

5 Keys to Success that I Learned from John Legend

141372052620141014IMG_1008I am always on the lookout for things to learn from Successful people and when I went to see John Legend Live 2 weeks ago, I was not disappointed. The man oozes confidence, success and happiness in such a ‘cool’ way. When you listen to him speak in between songs you can tell that he has learned a lot on the way up and is very inspirational when he talks about it. Thankfully for everyone at the concert he gave away a lot about his journey and some of the keys to his success. I have narrowed it down to ‘5 Keys to Success’ that I believe have helped John Legend become who he is today.

1. Know How Great you are (and be Proud of it!)

There was just something about the way that John moved. The way he sat at the piano and perhaps the biggest give away to his confidence was the way he received applause. He just sort of stood there and looked so centred and confident whilst nodding a sort of ‘yea, I know I’m good’ style. For whatever reason in today’s society we have been culturally persuaded to think that knowing how good we are will be perceived as arrogant. Not True. You will rapidly increase your chances of success if you realise how great you and begin to accept it. Of course, be gracious just like Mr. Legend was but in your head you can be saying the most ‘arrogant’ things in the world. Think about it; how often do you let that little voice in your head say ridiculously negative things and get away with it? If you’re going to have inner conversation you might as well do what John Legend obviously does so well and be very positive about yourself.

2. Stand on the Shoulders of Giants

Why would you want to struggle and strain your way to the top when you can use the help and talents of other people? John Legend talked about spending time with multiple grammy award winners Lauryn Hill and Kanye West. It is clear that John was able to learn a lot from people like this and he featured on Lauryn Hill’s album and supported Kanye West on his tour. Sometimes you have to be prepared to live and learn from the success of others and even hang on to their coat tails a little bit. These days, John Legend has had many successful albums and tours of his own.

3. “Sometimes our Dreams Take a Detour”

John told a wonderful story of how he moved to New York City to pursue a career in music. He remembered how this didn’t go so well at the start and he actually spent some time as a management consultant! He laughed at the memory and came out with one of the most inspirational quotes I have ever heard live: “Sometimes our Dreams take a Detour”. Amazing. What John is saying is, of course the plan was to go to New York and become a recording artist straight away but sometimes you have to be aware that the path you take isn’t necessarily going to be ‘Plan A’.

4. Keep Going…

You, me or anyone that has read anything about ‘Success’ has come across this piece of advice many, many times. It was however, refreshing to hear the details of a story directly from someone as successful as John Legend. As mentioned above, he was a management consultant when he wanted to be a full time singer but he would still sing by night in a New York City Bar. He talked about the fact that there was only ever 5 people in attendance and 3 of those were bar staff! John didn’t let this deter him and he just kept on and on until he was successful. 

5. Do it for the People Close to you

John Legend’s 2 best performances of the night were a Song that he dedicated to his late grandmother and ‘All of me’ which is the number 1 that he wrote for his new wife. This is not a coincidence. These 2 people obviously mean an awful lot to him and no doubt provide the motivation, passion and belief to carry on working hard and making music. We can all use this to our advantage. Think of someone close to you or someone that you were close to that is no longer with us and dedicate your endeavours to them. This has been massive for me personally and you will be motivated and ultimately successful as a result.

 [hcshort id=”8″]

 

How to Overcome Fear And Improve Your Life Quickly

Watch the Video Blog Below on How to Overcome Fear and read the Blog Post Below

ID-100262240As time progresses I am getting more and more passionate about sharing videos and blog posts that contain ideas that have changed my life. One thing that I have had to do consistently is overcome fears. The exciting thing that I have discovered is that you can actually use fear to your advantage as opposed to being paralysed by it. The strategies that I am going to describe have been invaluable to me and some of my clients that have been suffering from the symptoms of fear.

You may be in a situation where you are doing anything and everything instead of doing the thing that you are scared to do. These tools on how to overcome fear will change your life in the same way that they have changed mine. They are the tools that I have learned and developed that allow me to work hard and smart on my goals every single day. They help me to take action on the things that improve my life, they help me to eat well, train hard and build my business.

Each and every time you find yourself not doing what you know you SHOULD be doing it’s because you’re not being totally honest with yourself as to how important the task actually is. You are subconsciously avoiding the things that scare you a little bit even though they’ll take you to where you want to go. That ‘Little Voice’ in your head starts saying things like “Ah it’s okay, you can do it later” or “It won’t make that much of a difference” or “I just don’t want to do it right now” or whatever ever other nonsense the little voice in your head is telling you.

ID-100174428You have to have the presence of mind to consciously say to that voice “STOP!..that is absolute rubbish! Ultimately, what price will I have to pay if I don’t do this right now? What major impact could it have on my life if I don’t do it?”

It is getting head on with the gravity of the situation that will get you back on track and making progress in spite of fear.

I often simplify human behaviour as a drive to gain good feelings or a drive to avoid bad feelings.

If you are not getting on with something, it is because you think that you’ll feel bad in some way if you do it. You have managed to associate bad feelings in some way to the task. This was useful when humans wanted to avoid the bad feelings of being in the presence of a Lion in the wild, however, it is often not as useful now. If you really sat down and thought about how much worse the bad feelings of being obese, with no energy and a likely early grave are than the good feelings of eating that extra cake are you’ll see the power of this idea. We often find ourselves focusing on the immediate good feelings that we will have without considering the long term bad feelings.

There are many Questions you can ask yourself to change your focus to the overall impact on the quality of your life. Here are some that I use to realise the bad feelings that are coming my way if I keep living in this fearful, negative way:

“What will be the overall effect on my life if I keep doing this?”

“What price will I pay in my health, relationships and finances?”

“What will I deny myself in my life if I keep living like this?”

“What has living like this already cost me?”

Here are the questions that I ask myself to induce the good feelings that I will experience if I do the things that will make my life better, even though I may be fearful:

“How will my life improve by doing this?”

“How does doing it move me closer to achieving my BIG goals?”

“How will doing this improve my health, finances and my relationships?”

“Why will I be grateful in 20 years time for doing it?”

ID-10022465I have found that fear can be a sneaky temptress and you can be subconsciously fearful of all sorts of bad feelings that you didn’t even no existed. For example, at the back of your mind, you may believe that if you become a millionaire all of your friends will be jealous and no one will like you. This fear will lead you to link bad feelings to being a millionaire and therefore make you procrastinate and not work on creating financial freedom for you and your family.

The secret is to ask these questions with every choice that you face; fries or salad? Write a business plan or Browse Facebook? Gym or TV? Do you see how often we are faced by these choices?

If you still find yourself not making progress on your goals because of pesky little subconscious fears it is because you haven’t been totally honest with yourself yet.

You cannot get to the point where you know how to overcome fear by just thinking about the good feelings and the bad feelings on an intellectual level. You have to truly FEEL them at your emotional centre. Experience the intense good feelings of being a happy, healthy, success at your very core and experience the overwhelming bad feelings of being an overweight failure and you really are on the road to lasting change.

The fact of the matter is you KNOW that you should be more afraid of what your destructive habits are doing to you but do you actually feel it?

[hcshort id=”8″]

 

 

10 Reasons Why You Need a Life Coach

life-coachIf that negative little voice woke up when you read the headline of this article and said “I don’t need a life coach”. Take a breather, you may need to read this more than anyone else.

Whether it is the best selling self-help books of all time, the best athletes or the world’s most successful businessmen; all of their best advice would have one thing in common: The most rapid route to success/achievement in anything is to locate a coach, role model or mentor that has either achieved what you are trying to achieve or has helped others to achieve it. This is something that you have heard before, right? All of the successful people that I have studied offer this advice, from Tiger Woods to Tony Robbins.

Although this is true and everyone accepts this notion, most people don’t have a life coach in their lives. We are all addicted to the “I can do it myself” mentality and we are not prepared to invest our money into the most important thing in our lives (ourselves!). I used to be one of these people and it was holding me back from success. I now have several coaches and mentors to coach me in different areas of my life and if I could turn back the clock, I would have had a life coach as soon as I turned 18 (if not younger). I would have saved so much time, money and effort. That being said, I will be forever grateful for the coaches and mentors that I have in my life right now and I am delighted to have learned from my mistakes.

I have been doing a lot of reflecting recently and I decided to make a Video about “The10 Reasons Why you Need a Life Coach”. Having a coach has allowed me to improve my life much faster and has allowed me to become a much better life coach myself. Whatever I have invested in coaching I have always made it back at least 3 times over in time and money. Without my coach I wouldn’t have started my own business, I wouldn’t have got down to 7% body fat, I wouldn’t have cured my asthma, I wouldn’t be making money on the internet whilst I was asleep; I wouldn’t have achieved so many things.  

Please Watch My Video Blog on The 10 Reasons Why you Need a Life Coach:


In the above Video I discuss how having coaches has impacted my life and how much my life has changed as a result. 

10 Reasons Why You Need a Life Coach

Below are the 10 Reasons Why you Need a Life Coach in more detail:

1. Having a Life Coach Saves you Time and Brings you in a State of ‘Rapid Achievement’

We are all running out of time. You can always get more money, more food, more cars, more businesses but you’ll never be able to get more time. Although this is true and people, once again, accept this idea on an intellectual level, they still try to do things the hard way; by themselves and end up wasting precious time. This happens when we try and do things on or own because we are on a path that is new to us and we don’t know the fastest route. 

Imagine you were stuck in the Sahara Desert and you had to find your way to civilisation. You could end up on an incredibly frustrating, stressful journey of trial and error that would ultimately end in your death.

Now imagine the same scenario but you are allowed to have the most experienced Sahara Desert Navigator in the world with you at all times. This person knows every inch of the great desert, knows how to survive and knows how to get to civilisation very quickly one hundred times out of a hundred. Would this save you time, stress and anguish? Would it ultimately save life your life? In fact, would this actually end up being an enjoyable experience that you would recommend to your family and friends? 

This is the best way I can describe having a coach. They give you the ‘map’ or the path to follow. Like the Desert Adventurer they have been there before, they know how to help you and they will get you to where you need to go a lot faster. They know every wrong turn to avoid and they know exactly what to do if you venture in the wrong direction.

2. Having a Life Coach Makes you Accountable

When I had my first life coach I really benefited from being held accountable for everything that I did. When you have a life coach you’ll find yourself procrastinating less, you’ll stop fear from holding you back and you’ll generally get things done faster. Every human has limiting beliefs and restrains that we place on ourselves. We all have thought and behaviour patterns that stop us from fulfilling our greatest potential. A life coach that is there to push you to heights that you have never been to before will allow you to have breakthroughs and “aha” moments. Once this happens, your life elevates itself quickly and easily.

Business-coach

The idea of a coach making you accountable addresses the fact that most of us already know what we have to do to move forward but we just don’t do it. Having a life coach that expects you to have made progress by your next call or session makes sure that you get on with things! The life coaching process will teach you to place no value on excuses and to only be interested in taking action. When you are doing things by yourself, you only answer to yourself. And as you probably already know, you are very good and finding excuses as to why you couldn’t do it. What I found in being accountable to a coach is that just the thought of giving excuses makes you feel embarrassed so you force yourself to step up. 

3. Having a Life Coach Allows you to Vent Your Frustrations in a ‘Safe’ Environment

You know those days where things just don’t seem to be going quite right? Things have annoyed you, people have gone back on their word? You have tried your absolute best and things just haven’t worked out, you know those days, right? It is great to have supportive family and friends in this situation but I can tell you there is nothing quite like having a Life Coach. With family and friends you ‘guess’ what there opinion is going to be before they give it, you let the tension build between you rather than venting it fully. With a Life Coach you can really get the most out of a day filled with bad moments. A quality coach will get you to use your ‘bad day’ to your advantage, so you can push forward rather that be held back. 

4. Having a Life Coach Saves you Money

I thought that running a coaching business and an online business simultaneously was going to be easy. After all, I had read a couple of books, I had the motivation, I had the skills, right? WRONG. I really had no idea and when you have no idea you are letting money just pass you buy. To compound this further, you will find yourself (just like I did) wasting money on things that you think will make you money but end up making you nothing. You start to operate at a loss. When I took on a coach to help me with my business, he told me what to DO and I did it. He ended up thinking of things that I never would have thought of, he believed that I could do it. All I had to do was execute.

Going into all of the ways that coaches have helped me would take a very long time indeed. It suffices to say that the investment that I have made in coaches has saved me thousands of pounds! If that little voice in your head has ever said “I can’t afford a Life Coach”, let me tell you the plain truth You can’t afford NOT to have one!

5. Having a Life Coach will Help you Find Your Purpose

I had no idea what my purpose was when I first entered into life coaching and mentoring programmes. Yes, I had started to turn my life around and I had improved my daily behaviour. I knew that I wanted to help people do the same but with help from my coach, I discovered my purpose. I now know that I am here to truly inspire others to believe in and live a life filled with health, wealth and happiness. 

What purpose could you have sitting inside of you? I don’t know you but I do know something about you…you have greatness within you. The world is waiting for your massive contribution. Unfortunately, without someone’s help you may never discover what that purpose actually is. 

6. Having a Life Coach Give You Ideas you may Have Never had

When I first started as Life Coach I was only offering ‘hour-by-hour’ coaching. This was giving me a decent living but I wanted to build something bigger. That was when my life coach suggested that I start offering ‘Transformational Programmes’ that involved similar processes that I had used to change my life. At first I tried to tell him that I wasn’t sure it would work and that was when he coached me through the fact that I was just fearful of offering more expensive programmes. 

These are now the programmes that I offer clients from all over the world and they can adapted for face to face coaching, email coaching, skype coaching and telephone coaching. My business is as much as 4 times as profitable as a result of this one idea and better still, I no longer have to pencil in multiple one hour slots that effect my business activity. 

7. Having a Life Coach Helps you Avoid Unnecessary Stress

HappinessNumber 1 touches on how you will be saved stress and potential pain by having a Life Coach but it is worth mentioning in more detail. Ultimately, life is made up moments and if the majority of these moments are positive moments we are in for a positive life right? The great thing about having a coach is they can help you to avoid potential stress in the future, either because they have lived it themselves or they have helped other people avoid it. The greatest unnecessary stress that a life coach allows you avoid is the stress of getting things wrong over and over and again. Why try 100 different diets when a coach can get you to a place where you’re looking and feeling amazing first time round? A life coach will allow you to take the right route at the right time meaning you’ll be on a journey with the stressful obstacles already removed by the coach.

8. Having a Life Coach Makes Your Feel Excited About Life Again

Do you remember, as a child when every day was like an adventure? What cardboard box were you going to turn into a spaceship? What spoonful of green stuff would whizz itself towards your mouth posing as an aeroplane? What furniture item would be your new climbing frame? Life can be like this again! These creative, adventurous tendencies that are ‘beaten out of us’ by life are not extinct. They just lay dormant. A coach will bring these attributes back to life. Having a coach will make every day feel like an adventure again. What new business will you start? How will you go out and meet the love of your life? What new sport will you try? Your coach will open up a list of exciting questions that are in your head and then encourage you to go out and answer them.

9. Having a Life Coach will Help you to Get to Know Yourself Better.

My coaches and mentors have allowed me to gain such amazing insights into myself and who I am. Every step that you take in the coaching journey, your coach will provide you with feedback and help you make new discoveries. I am a big fan of the phrase “You can’t see the picture when you are in the frame”. I can honestly say that with every single one of the clients that I have coached over the last 3 years I have always noticed subtleties in the way that they think and act that they weren’t even aware of. Often times it is a ‘story’ that I can tell they have’on repeat’ in their head or the way that the quality of their body language drops when they talk about a certain aspect of their lives. The only way that these negative, unconscious thought processes and behaviours can be undone is if we are deliberately ‘reprogrammed’ by someone else.

The beauty of having a coach make you aware of these challenges is that you can rapidly change them together. I’ve seen absolutely phenomenal transformations just by making a small change. This was particularly true of one client of mine who we’ll call Jane for the purposes of this Blog Post. Whenever, Jane would talk about a particular family member I would literally watch her shoulders drop and I could sense her making negative pictures on the screen of her mind. Just by tackling this issue head-on, Jane made all kinds of positive strides in every area of her life. She was no-longer a prisoner of unconscious thoughts and behaviours. Without a coach Jane never would have known.

10. Having a Life Coach will Make you More Confident

I’d be willing to bet you that there is a list of things that you want to do but you don’t feel confident enough or you don’t have the self-belief to do them. When my coach suggested that I run in the Cardiff Half Marathon I didn’t think that I could do it. I had taken on the belief that the doctors had given me that I couldn’t run long distance on a hard surface. That’s when my coach reminded me of an important fact: “someone’s opinion of you does not have to become your reality”. This ‘shot in the arm’ allowed me to get confident enough to start the training program and ultimately complete the run. I believed in his belief in me. Having a coach will make you step up, raise your standards and your confidence will grow as an inevitable by-product.

Happy-lifeIf Tiger Woods, Beyonce and Richard Branson have Coaches…

Every person at the top of any field has a coach. Whether we are talking entertainers, sports people or business people. If they need coaches, so do we! Answer me this, does Beyonce need a coach? Does Richard Branson need a coach? Of course they don’t, but by having coaches in their lives it gives them a ‘cutting edge’. They use the coaches to draw more out of themselves that they ever would have gotten on their own.

No successful person got to where they are on their own. They all had mentors, coaches, advisers and role models. It’s time to make the “I can make it on my own” philosophy, die. Stop telling yourself this story because it is preventing you from getting to where you want to go in life. The next thing that troublesome little voice in your will say is “I can’t afford it”. More nonsense! I have come to realise that when anyone (me included) says those words it is in fact nothing to do with money and everything to do with how committed you are. With full commitment, you make things happen. It’s an old analogy but answer it truthfully: if someone had a gun held to the head of the person that you love most in this world and said “if you don’t get me £5,000 in 4 weeks I pull the trigger”, we both know that you would find the money. It sounds far fetched but you can literally take that level of commitment and urgency into everything that you do.

So many times in recent years, I haven’t had the money for a coach or to attend an inspirational event or start another passive income stream. Rather than saying to myself “I can’t afford it” and leaving it there I now say “If I am committed to making this happen, I will find the money and I will find it quickly”.

The most recent example of this was when I had money tied up in my businesses and I didn’t have the cash-flow to capitalise on an opportunity to make more money online. Did I just let the opportunity sail by? Of course not! I ended up selling a lot of stuff that I didn’t use any more on eBay. I got together £700 which was more than enough to get my new venture off the ground.

If I’m totally honest with you, you genuinely can’t afford not to have a coach. It’s costing you a fortune financially, physically, mentally and emotionally already. It may seem like I have gone to a lot of trouble, writing 3,000+ words to make the point that we should all have coaches but let me tell you one thing: if you are still reading these words you are the type of person that will reach world-beating heights with the help of a life coach! If you just read this post and then go back to what you were doing before, nothing changes. However, if you accept my challenge, take action on what you have just read and find a coach straight away, (yes right now), it will be one of the greatest decisions that you have ever made.

Even though I am phasing out the ‘One on One Coaching aspect of my business, I’d still love to hear from you if you’re interested in taking me on as your coach. Transforming people’s lives is my passion and I’d love to help you. I currently have 3 Open slots for coaching as several people have just renewed recurring coaching contracts. You can email jermaine@jermaine-harris.com to contact me about coaching or message me on my Facebook or Leave a Comment below. 

  [hcshort id=”8″]